I realized later this day that I'll be turning 16 tomorrow and well it hasn't sunk in yet! I know every year I say "I don't want to be __[depending on the age]" but now I really mean it...I mean 15, it's okay, 14 It's good in fact I wish I'd be 14 again 13, the more...but 16? 16 is such a big number. because when you're 16 you have to take better care of yourself, you need to study harder in order to get in to a good school in the future. and not to mention all the responsibilities you need to take care of...I know my responsibilities will be tripled this year on account of being the eldest child and of being an incoming senior. and this is the most frightening part of being a 16 year old...You have to make THE CHOICE as in the choice of what you want to be when you grow up...and to think that that choice you make would affect a great deal of your life because it is what you will be in the future. Indeed time flies by so fast. let me just prove it to you.
I remember when I was a little girl, I used to dream about growing up. I used to pretend to be whoever I wanted to be. I used to play by myself with my imaginary friend, I used to run around in the garden of my lola chasing dragonflies and grasshoppers, I used to play with crepe paper and be amused with the colors whenever I take a bath at my tita's bathroom, I used to sleep in between my parents and get tickled every morning when I wake up, I used to mispronounce words like ephelant, hipotamus,veterinarian and alaya...I used to sit in a basin and pretend it was a swimming pool, I used to take a bath using the hose and pretend it was raining, i used to run and stumble and get my knees skinned because of my clumsiness..I used to be very happy when my parents bring me to a toy store, I used to ride carousels whenever my dad arrives home from work, I used to cry and eat in front of a mirror. I used to make art works whenever I go visit my aunt, I used to eat ice cream and smudge it all over my face, I used to cry whenever my parents left the house with out bringing me along with them, I used to run away and get scared whenever I see a mascot, I used to dance and sing in front of people who forced me to do it, I used to get reprimanded for eating a lot of candies and not brushing my teeth after wards. It seemed like just yesterday I was learning how to walk. that I was still being carried in my mom's arms where Id perfectly fit and now I dont. that I sleep in my parents room and my dad would carry me back to my own room. that whenever we were dismissed from school my mom would wait for me in the gate with a smile on her face. Well, I could go on but then you'd be bored.
As I have said during a previous post that I learned so many things this year. Well, I did learn them. and It helped me become a better person..and for that I want to say that I appreciate the people who molded me into someone like me...I can't mention all of you so I"ll just generalize it...Thank you to my Family, my Friends, my Teachers and everybody else...
Like most of the people I am not ashamed to admit that I am also afraid of change, because it is the most uncertain thing in this place called life. It's scary cause one day you are fine and the next day you will be feeling bad. I know that change is inevitable we cant escape it and I guess change is what's holding me back to be mature. I really want to grow up, but I'm really scared I'll miss my childhood. Cause when you are a child, you can do anything!
Well, this would probably be my last post when I am 15 years old! being 15 was fun and I learned a lot from being 15 to0! and I definitely look forward to being 16 despite all the responsibilities...
-I just can't get over the fact that I'm turning 16 tomorrow!
-E.C.
I was teary eyed when I wrote this!!!
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